my seventeenth..

i knew i grew up. time changed. life metamorphosed. i matured.

unlike before, i didn’t look forward to the celebration. i didn’t asked for a cake or an ice cream. i didn’t invite lots of friends. i just wanted that day to be over. ’cause it was more than just a date. it actually symbolized an ending, a beginning, and a continuance.

now that my seventeenth birthday had passed, i couldn’t seem to see much difference. yet i feel very different. perhaps, i learned that changes are not always obvious. sometimes, i have to let them pass by naturally. sometimes, it’s better to be not-so-self-conscious. ’cause genuine changes are those that i don’t notice, but other people do.

maybe it’s time to end my bad old ways. maybe it’s time to be a real angel. to stop grieving over old faults. and to be who i really want to be, not just a programmed and brainwashed kid. maybe it’s time to continue the battle i started, a battle in which i am the enemy of my own self. i have to beat my own records. i have to defeat old triumphs. ’cause the Angel i know is always ready to fight, sets better reputations everyday, and makes her history profound and superb.

i guess it took me seventeen years to realized all these. i know it’s not too late for changes. i still have my whole life ahead of me anyway…

…and i have to make sure that this life is worth living.